Archives for category: Body ‘n’ Soul

Magnetic pull

Frustrated by the partners you attract?
If you are experiencing frustration with the type of men that you attract? Well if you are  here is some food for thought.  As you become more and more successful and strong in expressing masculine qualities chances are you making these 3 critical mistakes with men:

Mistake 1: Not appreciating him
As we become stronger and more powerful, it becomes harder for us to appreciate men, and the gifts that they bring to us.  It is only natural, if we are able to accomplish what men can, we don’t see them as a pillar of strength and support anymore.  We don’t trust their masculinity, we don’t trust their natural ability to provide for us and to protect us… we step in and try to do the job ourselves.

Men have many gifts
While we are capable of “doing the job”, the question is – should we? Men have many gifts to give to the world. They protect, they lead with direction, they take care of the hardships of life, which allows us to feel feminine and relax. Men feel good, when we allow them to be our “heroes”.  What we generally fail to understand in the Western world is that men have innate need and desire to go out and hunt, men have the DNA of a hunter, and with that comes the instinct to provide  for their family and protect their female mate.  However, what a “hunter” needs in order to thrive is… ‘appreciation’….. Appreciating his effort literally fuels a man and inspires him to go out again and again, and hunt some more.  Lack of appreciation has just the opposite effect, and it kills his desire to do anything for us.

Show appreciation
If appreciation is not something you know how to do well, please be encouraged to start right now…  start small, learn to appreciate even the little things that men do… taking out the rubbish, making sure your car is safe etc… show appreciation and the man in your life will feel inspired to move mountains for you.

Mistake 2: Stepping in and taking on a masculine role
If you are used to making decisions all day long, solving problems and dealing with challenges, it’s only natural that you may take these qualities into your intimate and personal relationships.  Chances are that you step in and take charge a little too quickly. Especially, if he isn’t making strong decisions, or the kind of decisions that you believe serve you, or the relationship as a whole.

tempation

Resisting temptation
Please, resist this temptation.  It leaves him feeling emasculated and you overburdened.  Instead, learn how to cultivate your Feminine essence and inspire him to make better decisions.  You can also help a man feel more powerful in his Masculine self by trusting his direction and purpose and showing faith in his ability to make things happen and produce results.

Furthermore, as women step in and try to do everything themselves, they leave men feeling unappreciated and powerless. They literally emasculate the very man inside. There will be more depth and connection in your personal relationships, if you resist the temptation to emasculate him, and prove yourself to be a “better man”.

Mistake 3: Not understanding and appreciating your Feminine essence
This is a tough one, and the very one that makes you feel you need to prove yourself strong and masculine, in order to be respected and loved.  What makes this mistake easy to make is that in the Western world, we are conditioned to value Masculine qualities… determination, fearlessness, etc.  This conditioning is so strong, to a point that we make our Feminine qualities wrong – being sensitive, caring, and free-spirited is not looked upon as a good role model for success.

Masculine essence  
Yet, these are the very qualities that will attract to you to the mate that you are yearning for… a man who is already strong, powerful and successful himself is not looking for a woman to match him.  What this type of man needs is a woman to inspire him and bring him closer to his heart, a woman who trusts his ability to make things happen, believes in him and, even when he is down on his knees, will have a way to inspire him back on his feet.

Feminine essence
If you allow your Feminine essence to weaken in your search for success and power, it will be impossible to create the vacuum that a Masculine man needs in order to be attracted by you.  Remember, attraction is a magnetic pull, and not a choice.  Being happy and content with your Feminine self is the key to attracting a man, who has the strength and charisma to appreciate you and fall in love with you.

Love magent

Magnetic pull
Within the novel ‘Soulmate’ a story of love, lust, deceit, betrayal, false flattery, psychology, attempted murder and intrigue, there was so much magnetic pull between the main character Tillie Anton and her lover Robbie Hardcastle; however there were elements in their story where the  masculine and feminine essences shifted. Find out what happened to them as these changed occurred. Was it a happy ending?

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=trisha+proud

http://www.slideshare.net/trishaproud/seeking-soulmate-support

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Read More 1

Is the traditional book dead?
With the arrival and increased use of Kindles, Nook readers and ipads many argue that traditional books are dead; some people however still like the look and feel of a paper book. Whatever your preference there can be no doubt that electronic books have features that paper books don’t.

Read in sunlight and enlarge the text!
With an electronic book you can see the screen clearly even in sunlight as well as being able to enlarge the print on the screen or plug in earphones and ‘listen’ to a book, which is great if relaxing, travelling or when on holiday. This ability to be able to enlarge the typeface is also a valuable factor for the visually impaired and for the more mature generation who sometimes prefer larger font size.

Listen to your e-book!
Plug in earphones and ‘listen’ to a book is another valuable factor specially if the reader is a little hard of hearing or perhaps they just want to close their eyes and be entertained.

13 good reasons why you should read more
Reading undoubtedly will help make you smarter! But there are other factors about reading which are also good for you; whether you read an electronic or paper book. Here are 10 good reasons why you should read more.

reading 2

1. Reading expands your vocabulary
When reading literature of different genres, it is likely that you will encounter words you don’t usually use in your regular every day conversations. The beauty of this is that there is no need to search for a definition of every single word you don’t know because in most cases your brain will automatically tell you what the word means in the context of the piece. Reading not only helps expand your vocabulary, but also improves your literacy.

2. Reading fights stress
Nowadays, fighting stress is a big concern for many people. Even though you may be manically busy at home or at work reading can help de-stress you. That is because the richness and rhythm of the language soothe the psyche and rids the body of stress. Apparently reading science fiction before bed is particularly helpful.

3. Reading develops thinking processes
When we read, we have more thinking processes going on; this helps to comprehend the ideas of the book and as a result reading helps the brain organize data.

4. Reading develops cognitive abilities
The positive effect of reading on our cognition, which are the ability to reasons and acquire knowledge through reading; also intuition and perception is another of its key advantages.

5. Reading protects against brain disorders
We are often told to keep active as we get older, both physically and mentally. According to the latest research, reading does indeed protect against brain disorders; that is because when we read, our brain activity improves.

6. Reading gives you confidence
Books not only relax us and keep us alert, but they also make us more confident in our own aptitude and knowledge. When we demonstrate deeper knowledge of a topic in a conversation, we automatically start behaving more confidently. In addition recognition of your intellectual capabilities by other people has a positive effect on our self-esteem too.

7. Reading makes us more creative
Creative people generate several great ideas at the same time. Where do they find their foundation for these ideas….. In the books! When you read, we discover lots of ideas, some of which we can use at work or in your own lives.

8. Reading makes us explore ideas
When you read, we discover lots of ideas…..Some of which we can explore and develop; ideas that perhaps  we can use at work or in your private lives

9. Reading improves sleep
The people, who make it a habit to read before they go to bed, find that their bodies soon gets used to it. Reading will become a signal for your body, it will automatically know about the forthcoming sleep. Not only will you have a good night’s sleep, but you will also feel positive and cheerful in the morning.

10. Reading improves brain function
When reading, we imagine many details – characters, their clothes, scenery, objects and plots. We also need to keep in mind many facts in order to understand the book as a whole; therefore by reading we are training our memory and logic.

11. Reading improves concentration
When reading we need to focus on the content of the book in order to comprehend what is going on as we turn each page, without cheating or jumping ahead to the next chapter. This skill is very useful in your other activities in life, whether at home or at work; because without realizing it reading also helps develop objectivity and reasonable decision-making.

12. Reading helps us to be aspirational
Reading provides insights into how others live their lives and do things; it also provides fantasy and escapism. For many without the fantasy and escapism of books there is no aspiration or desire to try and do things differently. All management books, self help books and the like are based on the readers desire to be “aspirational” in their lives or roles…..and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

13. Reading helps us learn
Learning helps us keep up to date, to keep alert we should learn something new… everyday because reading helps you grow as a person. There is so much to learn…..new facts or information – there is so much to learn in life.

Reading makes you ‘smart’……..Reading teaches us about life
So what “aspirational” book are you reading today?  Be ‘smart’ and download a copy of ‘Soulmate’ from Amazon today to learn about these valuable ‘life lessons’
• Deceit
• Betrayal
 Psychology
 Love vs. lust
 False flattery
 Givers and takers

Learn more
Learn more about valuable life lessons from the novel “Soulmate” a story of love, lust, deceit, betrayal, false flattery, psychology, attempted murder and intrigue!

Happy ending?
Within the novel the main characters (Tillie Anton and Robbie Hardcastle) learned  many of life lessons – but the question is did they really use these learning’s wisely. ….Was it a happy ending?

Soulmate Book Front-Coverhttp://www.slideshare.net/trishaproud/reading-makes-you-smart

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=trisha+proud

Happiness

Is there such thing as happiness?  The good news is yes, there is! In order to have happiness come to your life however, there are few rules that ideally you should followed. Basically, all you need to do is to stay positive and treat yourself, as well as others, with respect love and understanding.

Never place your happiness in someone else’s hands, because when they are gone……so is your happiness!

10 Keys to happier living:

1 GIVING: Happiness is not just about taking…it’s more about giving. If someone needs your assistance whether they be your soulmate, family, friend or work colleague – give it. Altruistic behaviour releases endorphin’s in the brain and makes us happy as well as people we help. Giving has a positive knock-on impact.

2. RELATING… Start connecting with people…Build strong relationships with your soulmate, relatives and friends. People with broader social networks always have a ‘go to person’ in a crisis; besides which they are also happier, healthier and live longer.

3. EXERCISE…Take care of your health…as well as your heart… Go for a jog, do some exercises, sleep well. Physical activity not only improves how you look but also your mood and helps fight off depression.

4. APPRECIATING… Take a good look at the world around you…       I mean really look at the world around you! Get outside and spend some time contemplating nature. Being more mindful and aware helps brings us to the enjoyment of the present moment.

5. TRYING OUT…Keep learning new things… Strive for self-improvement. Learning keeps us curious and boosts our self-esteem and self-confidence as well as a sense of accomplishment. Learn a foreign language, or try a new sport. The critical thing to remember here is that it is happiness that fuels success, not the other way around.

6. DIRECTION… Have goals to look forward and achieve… Goals give us motivation to advance and sense of accomplishment and satisfaction, once we achieve them. No goals means no focus.

7. RESILIENCE…Find ways to bounce back… Sadly you cannot avoid stress, loss, failure, or trauma in your life. We all have it at one time or another sometimes it is not your fault and you can’t stop it happening. What you can change though is your attitude towards it …. the way you deal with it.

Always stay positive because out of everything bad comes something good. I always quote Colonel Sanders of Kentucky Fried Chicken fame; He was well into his 60’s and had visited over 1,000 restaurants with his unique recipe before somebody said that they would buy it!

8. EMOTION… Keep a positive approach to life…Always ensure that you have positive emotions – like joy, gratitude, contentment, reciprocity, inspiration, and pride – these emotions affect our long-term well-being. Of course, life has its ups and downs, but focusing on the positive side never hurts. Staying positive and having resilience is an attractive feature which attracts good towards you.It may be difficult, but definitely a skill worth mastering.

9. ACCEPTANCE… Be comfortable with who you are…. Don’t be obsessed with your imperfections. Focus on what you have got rather than what you have not. Learning to accept yourself, the way you are also helps you accept others as they are.

10. MEANING… People who have meaning and purpose in their lives are happier…People who have meaning in their lives feel in control and get more out of what they do. Being part of a club, working a job that makes a difference, raising a child – find your own connection to something bigger than yourself.

So… don’t put your key to happiness in somebody else’s pocket! In the novel “Soulmate”, a heart-warming tale of love, lust, murder mystery and psychology, there was plenty of opportunities for the main characters (Tillie Anton and Robbie Hardcastle) to take happiness into their own hands – but did they? Was it a happy ending?

Follow their story as it details the highs and lows of life and all that their live experiences taught them. Lessons on happiness, dealing with understanding mix messages, false flattery, betrayal, injustice, deceit and the hardest lesson of all, the lesson of love; Was Pluto right do we only ever have one “Soulmate”?

https://twitter.com/SoulmateNovel

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=trisha+proud

http://www.slideshare.net/trishaproud/great-holiday-read

http://www.slideshare.net/trishaproud/seeking-soulmate-support

DivaFlower Pic
Male and female divas
What is the first thing that springs to mind when you hear the word ‘diva’?

In many circles a diva is widely thought as being an all female trait, however contrary to popular belief divas can be both male and female.

The word ‘diva’ is commonly associated with pop stars and celebrity icons. Nonetheless the reality is that divas exist in all walks of life.

High-maintenance narcissists
Divas, by definition, are high-performing, high-maintenance narcissists. Some are really needy, demanding, and negative. Divas talk almost incessantly about themselves. Researchers say these are ‘unhealthy divas’ and the source of their narcissism usually is low self-esteem: They are constantly trying to pump themselves up.

Divas adore the limelight
Yet, believe it or not, researchers say some divas are healthy. They adore the limelight and work hard to be always front and center, but they are willing to make room for others. They are spirited, fun and positive. Because they assume everyone around them is interested in them, they share a lot of themselves and in this way bring people together. They have the ability to help others enjoy things that aren’t normally enjoyable, whether it’s a long line at the store, an office meeting or dinner with the boss.

Healthy divas stand up for others
What separates a healthy diva from an unhealthy diva is this: Healthy divas stand up for others, not just themselves. They are confident of their abilities and contributions, and they love recognition, but they are happy to give credit to others also.

Sense of entitlement
All divas are talented and feel a sense of entitlement. They aren’t reluctant to tell their soulmate, spouse, or lover, or even work colleagues exactly what they want for their birthday or to ask for a raise.

* They deliver 150%.
* Healthy divas, though, are self-aware.
* Knowing that they are worth it.
* Their sense of privilege comes from their knowledge …
* They know that it’s important to say:
– “This is what I do well”
– “This is what I deserve”
– “This is what I expect in a relationship”

Deliberate divas

Dan Nainan, a 31-year-old comedian in New York City, says he became more assertive and inflexible a few years ago, after reading a newspaper interview with a call girl. “She said that when she charged $500, men treated her like dirt, so she upped her price to $3,000, and now men treat her like gold,” he says. “That really opened my mind.”

Divas with a purpose
Another big influence, Mr. Nainan says, was one of the rock music world’s original divas—David Lee Roth, who famously put a clause in the concert contract for the band Van Halen banning brown M&Ms backstage. (It was a safety measure, the singer has explained: If brown M&Ms appeared on the catering table, he knew the concert promoter hadn’t read the contract, which gave detailed instructions for constructing the stage set.)

Demand what you are worth
Mr. Nainan, who entertains at corporate events and weddings, now sometimes channels his inner rock star. He refuses to perform when he isn’t paid before going on stage, as his contract specifies. “If you are the talent, you need to demand what you are worth,” he says. “I am worth it.”

From humble to diva
Experts say a humble person can learn to be a healthy diva. But there’s more to it than just throwing on a power suit and some attitude. You need to project confidence through body language and speech. You may want to cultivate a presence, through your posture and personal style, and let your personality shine.

And don’t forget: You need to recognize others as well as yourself.

Does your Soulmate dare to diva?
Is your soulmate a healthy or unhealthy diva?

In the novel “Soulmate”, a heart-warming tale of love, lust, murder mystery and psychology, there are plenty of divas….Some healthy and some unhealthy. Find out what happened to the ‘Soulmates’ and the divas that tried to keep them apart. Follow their story as it details the highs and lows of life and all that this taught them. Lessons on dealing with divas, intelligence, false flattery, betrayal, injustice, deceit and the hardest lesson of all, the lesson of love; Was Pluto right do we only ever have one “Soulmate”?

https://twitter.com/SoulmateNovel

http://www.amazon.com/Soulmate-ebook/dp/B0092GV73W/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1346086973&sr=8-3&keywords=trisha+proud

http://www.trishaproud.com

Love sleep
Rested – Ready to manage your relationship?

When we mention sleep in a relationship the true meaning of sleep is often the last thing on our mind! Apparently it is a little known secret that sleep is critical, not just for beauty rest, but for plenty of health reasons, including ensuring that we have healthy personal relationships.

Take time to reflect
Sadly outside of the space of personal relationships it has become acceptable and even encouraged in business today to ‘stay busy’. When we disrupt our natural sleep cycles in favour of ‘getting more done,’ we actually become less effective. Typically, because we don’t take time to reflect on what is purposeful and important to us, such as our personal relationships, we often find ourselves doing things that are not really relevant to our own aims, goals and desires

Are some of you thinking, ‘what aims, goals and desires?’ There are an awful lot of people our there that have lost sight of what is truly important to them.

To-do lists good or bad?
As a writer I advocate ‘to-do list’ but I don’t advocate becoming addicted to them! For many they have become addicted to ‘to-do’ lists without holding a clear endgame goal in mind. This is energetically inefficient and physically draining. Often there is typically no passion in the relationship and thus it becomes no more than hard work instead of enjoyable. Issues also take much longer to address, when we are not focused.

De-valuing self-nurturance
Also, when the first flush of love and lust has gone from a relationship we tend to de-value self-nurturance, play, and creative relaxing pursuits, many people feel guilty or invalidated by those around them, when they attempt to live with more work vs. life balance.

Be courageous – create space
It takes courage and vision to create space in your life, so that you can stay healthy in spirit, mind and body. It takes courage to listen to your heart above the noise of the many distractions vying for your attention and money. It takes courage to work at building a relationship. And it will take courage and focused attention to slow down in the evening, early enough to get your mind and body prepared to go to sleep at a decent hour. On average, it is aid that we need at least 7 to 8 hours of sleep a night.

What are the benefits of sleep?
1. Improved memory: sleep helps to integrate learning and feelings. Greater focus and concentration improves with a good night’s sleep.

2. Stress reduction: sleep restores the body and mind and helps to balance well-being. When we are too stressed, it may be more difficult to sleep at night and this can become a vicious cycle. When we don’t get enough sleep, it makes it more difficult to deal with stress…..and let’s face it relationships can be stressful.

3. Bodily healing and rejuvenation: sleep reduces inflammation in the body. Chronic inflammation is associated with heart attack, stroke, premature aging, diabetes and arthritis

Don’t be short-sighted
Life is not a sprint, it is a long-distance journey. It is short-sighted to abuse your mind and body, as in the long run. Stress and lack of sleep not only makes you less productive, and less enjoyable to be around, it can accelerate the aging process and even contribute to other diseases. Be wise. Be courageous. Take good care of yourself and expand the vision for your life – with purpose.

Manage your time and relationships better
Sleep is not a luxury; is a means of rejuvenating your mind and body in readiness for the trials and tribulations that all relationships bring. So make sure that you get enough rest and relaxation time in order to be able to tackle any hurdles that you may face; to make your relationship stronger!

Too much lust and not enough sleep
The two main characters, Tillie and Robbie, in the novel “Soulmate”, a heartwarming tale of love, lust and psychology, had plenty of love, far too much lust and not enough sleep in their relationship as they worked hard to build their careers. Find out what happened to them; follow these two lovers as Tillie details the highs and lows of life and all that this taught them. Lessons on intelligence, false flattery, betrayal, injustice, deceit and the hardest lesson of all, the lesson of love; Was Pluto right do we only ever have one “Soulmate”?
https://twitter.com/SoulmateNovel
http://www.amazon.com/Soulmate-ebook/dp/B0092GV73W/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1346086973&sr=8-3&keywords=trisha+proud

http://www.trishaproud.com

heart-spinner-yes-no-decisions
Are you an emotional decision maker?
All of us make decisions – everyday, whether at home, work, just socializing or in our love life. Decisions of the heart; we are always told to make decisions based on fact. They call this informed decision making. But is it the right way to make decisions of the heart? Mastering the art of decision making is indeed a key skill to master.

Neuro-Linguistic Programming or NLP tells us that there are primarily four types of people:
• Kinaesthetic
• Visual
• Auditory
• Auditory Visual

The name Neuro-Linguistic Programming was invented in the early 1970’s as an attempt to describe in a succinct manner the scope of this extensive body of insights and skills:
Neuro refers to how the mind and body interact
Linguistic refers to the insights into a person’s thinking that can be obtained by careful attention to their use of language
Programming refers, not to the activity of programming, but to the study of the thinking and behavioural patterns or ‘programmes’ which people use in their daily lives.

Dependant on what NLP category you are likely, (not always) but more often likely to make decisions based on:
• What you feel and sense and can physically touch
• What you can see
• What you can hear
• What details, facts and figures there are to help support your decision

The first two categories have strong ‘emotional needs’. Clearly the latter category makes decisions on less ‘emotion’.

Neuroscience
Although neuroscience has built a strong body of evidence over the years to demonstrate the inextricable link between reason, emotion and decision-making most of mainstream culture is still not on board with it.

There are some that still believe that women, especially, wear the mantle of “emotionality” and that these women still feel the need to compensate by subduing the expression of their feelings and thoughts. This surely cannot be healthy. There is nothing wrong in expressing a touch of emotion.

Although neuroscience has built a strong body of evidence over twenty-five years to demonstrate the inextricable link between reason, emotion and decision-making most of mainstream culture still doesn’t get it.

Reason over emotion
Mainstream thinking about reason over emotion is generally based on two assumptions:
1. That we have a “choice” whether to feel or not
2. That emotional “suppression” works.

Hooray!…
The brain does make decisions based on feeling

Research has found that there can be significant consequences when you try to push away thoughts and feelings; a ‘rebound’ effect. Simply put, these strategies often backfire and result in an increase of the intensity of the thoughts and emotions that are being suppressed.

In the book: “How we decide” by Jonah Lehrer; it the case that rationality depends on emotion. Motivation is driven by feeling, not intellect. Lehrer points out, “Emotion and motivation share the same Latin root, movere, which means to move. The world is full of things and it is our feelings that help us choose among them.”

Avoiding analysis-paralysis
Many of us try to rule out the emotional side of decision-making only to find we become stuck in so-called analysis-paralysis. We often avoid making decisions or make them hastily because we want to skip the feeling part, not only unavoidable, it’s short-sighted.

There continues to be a protracted controversy over reason and intuition, which is another version of the ancient reason over emotion battle. Lehrer makes the critical point that our emotional brains are deeply empirical and that every time you make a mistake or encounter something new, your brain cells are busy changing themselves. Emotions are profoundly smart and constantly learning, they are not simply animal instincts that must be tamed.

Balancing 7 + 2
What is known as the “7 plus or minus 2” rule is based on the research that short-term memory capacity varies from being able to hold between 4 and 9 bits of information at one time. When faced with too many variables, the brain simply makes the wrong decision because its resources are overburdened.

The Chunking Principle:
• Chunking is a principle that applies to the effective communication of information between human beings.
• It is particularly useful in the domain of written communication.
• It was first put forward in the 1950s by George A. Miller.
• Miller studied the short term memory.

In 1952, George A. Miller published a paper titled:
“The Magical Number Seven; Plus or Minus Two”
Today chunking is a term used in NLP to describe the process of grouping items into larger or smaller groups (or “chunks”) Chunking helps you to organise your thinking in order to better handle information and make decisions. So you need to make sure that you can optimize your decision-making process but not taking on too much.

Left and right brains
You have to build capacity in both your left and right brains; in other words the rational and the emotional. They are magically interlinked to ensure that we maximize the understanding of the world around us and the world within ourselves.

Decisions of the heart….
And remember……. Emotions and feelings are not a luxury; they are a means of communicating our states of mind to others. But they are also a way of guiding our own judgments and decisions. Emotions bring the body into the loop of reason. So if you make decisions of the heart, ‘with emotion’ then be sure to give yourself a pat on the back!

Are you making decisions of the heart in your relationship?
The main character Tillie, in the novel “Soulmate”, a heartwarming tale of love, lust and psychology, made to when she fell in love with Robbie. She had to decide whether or not he was her “Soulmate. Was Robbie her one true “Soulmate”?……Follow Tillie as she details the highs and lows of life, when trying to decide who her “Soulmate” really is and all that this taught her. Lessons on intelligence, false flattery, betrayal, injustice, deceit and the hardest lesson of all, the lesson of love; Was Pluto right do we only ever have one “Soulmate”?

https://twitter.com/SoulmateNovel
http://www.amazon.com/Soulmate-ebook/dp/B0092GV73W/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1346086973&sr=8-3&keywords=trisha+proud