Archives for category: Spirtual

Fishing for love

Does success equal a good catch?
Many of us are brought up to believe that success is a “good thing”, and for the most part it is.  But when it comes for women searching for their soulmate this might not necessarily be true. Wouldn’t men like you better and be more attracted to you, if you were more powerful, independent and successful?  Doesn’t that make you a “good catch”?

Well…..not exactly!


Challenging assumptions
The challenge lies in assuming that men and women are the same, and that men are attracted to the same qualities that women find attractive in men, such as charisma, strength, sense of fun, a strong sense of direction and purpose and the ability to produce results and succeed.

Attraction is triggered by Feminine and Masculine behaviours
While men value success in a woman, it is not exactly the quality that turns them on.  Attraction is triggered by split or division of Feminine and Masculine behaviours and the stronger your Masculine side is, the less interesting you are, well at least to a man who has the same strong masculine qualities as you.

He may enjoy an intelligent conversation with you, or even healthy competition from time to time… but there is no pull… therefore, he is not attracted to you and wouldn’t see you as long-term relationship potential.  It has nothing to do with beauty, or even ‘sex appeal’. It’s an energy that creates a feeling.


 Men are intuitive when selecting a mate
As much as we would like to think that men have no feelings, contrary to popular belief research shows that men are very intuitive when selecting a mate, and will know within seconds of meeting you, if you are a potentially a relationship material, a sexual object, or just a friend.

If the very idea of this makes you uncomfortable then please remember… attraction is not a choice… it’s either there, or it is not.  The good news is that you can trigger attraction in a split second.  How? Well, by shifting into your Feminine essence.  You evoke a man’s most powerful Masculine self, when you shift into your most Feminine vulnerable self… and that’s instant attraction … it creates vacuum in the space.

Shifting  modes
The real challenge is that “shifting out of a Masculine mode” may be hard for you to do, if you are used to being powerful, independent and strong… values that seem to be looked upon favourably in the Western world.

What does that have to do with relationships?  Well…quite  a lot.

Masculine Men are not attracted to Masculine Women
This is not an opinion… it’s a fact.  It’s a call of nature.  Attraction works as a magnet – the two opposites attract. As women grow more powerful in a Masculine way, they tend to attract the more Feminine type of men – the ones who have hard time making a decision, have no clear sense of direction and purpose, can’t make up their mind or speak up, the “yes, dear” type of men.


Why is this a challenge? 
Well, it’s only a challenge if, as a woman, you prefer the Masculine type of men, the ones who are on top of their game, are able to move mountains, and can be a pillar of strength for you to relax with.  This type of men will not be attracted to your success, independence and power; as a matter of fact, the more you express Masculine type of qualities, the higher the likelihood that a Masculine man will be repelled, as opposed to being attracted, by you.

Obliged to develop your masculine mode?
Within the novel ‘Soulmate’ a story of love, lust, deceit, betrayal, false flattery, psychology, attempted murder and intrigue, the main character Tillie Anton was a career focused women who felt obliged to develop her ‘masculine mode’.

Read how this impacted on her partner (Robbie Hardcastle) who was loving, caring and sharing and wanted to protect her. Did her less feminine approach make him feel less masculine? ……Was it a happy ending? Find out by downloading your copy of ‘Soulmate’ today.


Magnetic pull

Frustrated by the partners you attract?
If you are experiencing frustration with the type of men that you attract? Well if you are  here is some food for thought.  As you become more and more successful and strong in expressing masculine qualities chances are you making these 3 critical mistakes with men:

Mistake 1: Not appreciating him
As we become stronger and more powerful, it becomes harder for us to appreciate men, and the gifts that they bring to us.  It is only natural, if we are able to accomplish what men can, we don’t see them as a pillar of strength and support anymore.  We don’t trust their masculinity, we don’t trust their natural ability to provide for us and to protect us… we step in and try to do the job ourselves.

Men have many gifts
While we are capable of “doing the job”, the question is – should we? Men have many gifts to give to the world. They protect, they lead with direction, they take care of the hardships of life, which allows us to feel feminine and relax. Men feel good, when we allow them to be our “heroes”.  What we generally fail to understand in the Western world is that men have innate need and desire to go out and hunt, men have the DNA of a hunter, and with that comes the instinct to provide  for their family and protect their female mate.  However, what a “hunter” needs in order to thrive is… ‘appreciation’….. Appreciating his effort literally fuels a man and inspires him to go out again and again, and hunt some more.  Lack of appreciation has just the opposite effect, and it kills his desire to do anything for us.

Show appreciation
If appreciation is not something you know how to do well, please be encouraged to start right now…  start small, learn to appreciate even the little things that men do… taking out the rubbish, making sure your car is safe etc… show appreciation and the man in your life will feel inspired to move mountains for you.

Mistake 2: Stepping in and taking on a masculine role
If you are used to making decisions all day long, solving problems and dealing with challenges, it’s only natural that you may take these qualities into your intimate and personal relationships.  Chances are that you step in and take charge a little too quickly. Especially, if he isn’t making strong decisions, or the kind of decisions that you believe serve you, or the relationship as a whole.


Resisting temptation
Please, resist this temptation.  It leaves him feeling emasculated and you overburdened.  Instead, learn how to cultivate your Feminine essence and inspire him to make better decisions.  You can also help a man feel more powerful in his Masculine self by trusting his direction and purpose and showing faith in his ability to make things happen and produce results.

Furthermore, as women step in and try to do everything themselves, they leave men feeling unappreciated and powerless. They literally emasculate the very man inside. There will be more depth and connection in your personal relationships, if you resist the temptation to emasculate him, and prove yourself to be a “better man”.

Mistake 3: Not understanding and appreciating your Feminine essence
This is a tough one, and the very one that makes you feel you need to prove yourself strong and masculine, in order to be respected and loved.  What makes this mistake easy to make is that in the Western world, we are conditioned to value Masculine qualities… determination, fearlessness, etc.  This conditioning is so strong, to a point that we make our Feminine qualities wrong – being sensitive, caring, and free-spirited is not looked upon as a good role model for success.

Masculine essence  
Yet, these are the very qualities that will attract to you to the mate that you are yearning for… a man who is already strong, powerful and successful himself is not looking for a woman to match him.  What this type of man needs is a woman to inspire him and bring him closer to his heart, a woman who trusts his ability to make things happen, believes in him and, even when he is down on his knees, will have a way to inspire him back on his feet.

Feminine essence
If you allow your Feminine essence to weaken in your search for success and power, it will be impossible to create the vacuum that a Masculine man needs in order to be attracted by you.  Remember, attraction is a magnetic pull, and not a choice.  Being happy and content with your Feminine self is the key to attracting a man, who has the strength and charisma to appreciate you and fall in love with you.

Love magent

Magnetic pull
Within the novel ‘Soulmate’ a story of love, lust, deceit, betrayal, false flattery, psychology, attempted murder and intrigue, there was so much magnetic pull between the main character Tillie Anton and her lover Robbie Hardcastle; however there were elements in their story where the  masculine and feminine essences shifted. Find out what happened to them as these changed occurred. Was it a happy ending?

Decison Making
Are you an emotional decision maker?
All of us make decisions – everyday, whether at home, work or simply just socializing. There surely can be no doubt that this is a key skill to master, especially when you are making decisions about your family, friends, business or “Soulmate”…….not many of us comprehend that the same decision making process that we use in day-to-day business is the same decision making process we use within our personal life.

Do you need an emotional lifebelt when you make decisions?
For some people when it comes to decisions of the heart they seem to need a lifebelt; some form of safety mechanism that will stop them drowning in their sea of emotions.

There can be many reasons for this…..

Emotional Lifebelt

Neuro-Linguistic Programming or NLP tells us that there are primarily four types of people:

• Kinaesthetic
• Visual
• Auditory
• Auditory Visual

The name Neuro-Linguistic Programming was invented in the early 1970′s as an attempt to describe in a succinct manner the scope of this extensive body of insights and skills:

Neuro refers to how the mind and body interact

Linguistic refers to the insights into a person’s thinking that can be obtained by careful attention to their use of language

Programming refers, not to the activity of programming, but to the study of the thinking and behavioural patterns or ‘programmes’ which people use in their daily lives.

Your NLP category
Dependant on what NLP category you are it is likely, (not always) but you more often than not you are likely to make decisions based on:
• What you feel and sense and can physically touch
• What you can see
• What you can hear
• What details, facts and figures there are to help support your decision

Clearly the latter category makes decisions based on less ‘emotion’.

Although neuroscience has built a strong body of evidence over the years to demonstrate the inextricable link between reason, emotion and decision-making most of mainstream culture is still not on board with it.

Is it right or wrong to ‘leave their feelings at home’?
Within business we are often told to keep emotion out of decision-making and that professionals should ‘leave their feelings at home’ when they are at work. There are some that still believe that women especially, wear the mantle of emotionality in the workplace and that these women still feel the need to compensate by subduing the expression of their feelings and thoughts. This surely cannot be healthy.

Link between reason, emotion and decision-making
Although neuroscience has built a strong body of evidence over twenty-five years to demonstrate the inextricable link between reason, emotion and decision-making most of mainstream culture still doesn’t get it.

Mainstream thinking about reason over emotion is generally based on two assumptions:
1. That we have a choice whether to feel or not
2. That emotional “suppression” works

Hooray! – The brain does make decisions based on feeling
Research has found that there can be significant consequences when we try to push away thoughts and feelings; a ‘rebound’ effect. Simply put, these strategies often backfire and result in an increase of the intensity of the thoughts and emotions that are being suppressed.

Avoiding analysis-paralysis
Many of us try to rule out the emotional side of decision-making only to find we become stuck in so-called ‘analysis-paralysis’. We often avoid making decisions or make them hastily because we want to skip the feeling part, which is not only unavoidable; it is extremely short-sighted.

Emotions are profoundly smart
There continues to be a protracted controversy over reason and intuition, which is another version of the ancient reason over emotion battle. Our emotional brains are deeply empirical and that every time we make a mistake or encounter something new, your brain cells are busy changing themselves. Emotions are profoundly smart and constantly learning, they are not simply animal instincts that must be tamed.

The right “emotional decision?”
In the novel “Soulmate” the main character, Tillie Anton discovers some pornographic photographs which is too much for her to comprehend.

She most definitely needed an emotional lifebelt! 
This almost unbelievable discovery and the ramifications it brings her, to her life and career, forces Tillie to make a life changing decision. A decision that will leave her past behind her, but will it be possible for her to take her one true”Soulmate” with her? Discover whether Tillie make the right ‘emotional decision’ by downloading your copy of “Soulmate” today.

attitude is everything
Genuine Soulmates have had an attitude about them
Have you ever noticed that other people’s relationships that you admire have a uniqueness ….an ‘attitude’ about them?

They are not easily discouraged by obstacles and issues that might deter others. In fact, they don’t see them as “obstacles and issues”at all, but problems to solve and situations to work through. A real Soulmate will work and play hard to find and keep their ‘mate’; the love of their life happy, because in doing so they also are fulfilled.

In essence true Soulmates are not daunted by….

Soulmates are not daunted by failure:
Soulmates believe that if you fear failure too much and you’ll have a hard time getting past breakfast!

Soulmates are not daunted by rising before the sun does:
Show me a successful lazy entrepreneur and I’ll show you a purple horse. A true partner will work as hard as you in and outside of the relationship.

Soulmates are not daunted by hard work:
In fact they don’t think of it as “work.” Instead they think of it as an investment in you….in your joint relationship….your partnership.

Soulmates are not daunted by risk:
Too much risk is seldom good; but nothing really innovatively great is ever accomplished without some degree of risk, very often there can be quite a bit of risk to forming a great relationship.

Soulmates not daunted by ownership and responsibility:
They have no choice but to take it, Soulmates believe that if you want the rewards then they have to ‘go with the flow’ and also take ownership and responsibility.

Soulmates are not daunted by conflict:
Conflict is the currency of any relationship; you have to be able to handle it effectively or your other half, your Soulmate won’t want to follow you.

Soulmates are not daunted by what they cannot see with the naked eye:
Vision in a close relationship means looking past the horizon to opportunity invisible to others.

Soulmates are not daunted by bare forearms:
As in the kind that goes with rolled-up sleeves; to muck in and get invloved.

Soulmates are not daunted by the unknown:
Real Soulmates work at their personal relationships and are open to try new things to maintain it.

Soulmates are not daunted by admitting fault:
A true Soulmate instinctively knows that too much hubris, excessive pride or arrogance and they will have trouble in their relationship or simply being with others, which of course they need to in order to accomplish what they want and need, in order to be fulfilled themselves.

Does your relationship have ‘attitude’?
The two main characters, Tillie and Robbie, in the novel “Soulmate”, a heart-warming tale of love, lust and psychology, had plenty of love and respect for one another….but there were areas in their relationship where the wrong attitude was applied. Find out what happened to them; follow these two lovers as Tillie details the highs and lows of life and all that this taught them. Lessons on intelligence, false flattery, betrayal, injustice, deceit and the hardest lesson of all, the lesson of love; Was Pluto right do we only ever have one “Soulmate”?

Unconditional Love
Are you searching for unconditional love…..

There are five key principles to live by that can really help you unlock the key to finding unconditional soulmate love.

1. Make a fresh start – get the monkey off your back!
The first thing to remember when unlocking unconditional soulmate love in that your past does not equal your future. Just because you have not found love or perhaps have been hurt in the past, does not mean that you will be hurt again or that unconditional soulmate love will elude you.

Imagine carrying lots of monkey with you in a bag on your back, and as you go along, you collect more and more monkeys, how do you think you will feel if you continue to carry the monkeys? Most likely pretty tired! Even worse the monkeys will eventually turn into gorillas and then what!

What if someone came along emptied your bag of monkeys, and you were able to keep walking but this time, without any monkeys to carry! How would you feel then? Most probably much lighter; well the same is true for creating a fresh start, a fresh outlook on life.

2. Ditch misguided beliefs
In order to attract unconditional soulmate love you must ditch any misguided beliefs you hold and change them. Our beliefs can either spurn us forward towards our soulmate love or hold us back. Whatever you believe is what you will attract. The key thing here is to identify what beliefs you are holding about people and question them.

For example one way to check this out is to fill in the blank, “I don’t trust people because___________” and see what you come up with. You may have just one simple answer or you may have a whole list of things as to why you don’t trust people! Either way it will be very telling as to what reasons you have as to why you don’t trust others.

If the reasons that you don’t trust other people are spurious, then you will need to change those unconscious misguided beliefs. Once you change any inappropriate beliefs, you will start attracting more people you can trust and ultimately somebody that loves and trusts you back.

3. Trust yourself – trust your gut instinct
On the theme of trust this is really the key to it all, the central core. When we say we don’t trust others, it is usually because we don’t trust ourselves. This generally happens if you have been hurt in the past and therefore find it hard to trust others, as well as your own judgement. Unfortunately if you keep up with this pattern of mistrust, it will result in you not trusting yourself to recognise when someone that is good for you comes along.

You cannot expect others to trust you if you don’t trust yourself! Not having trust in your own judgement may have come from thinking that you have been proven wrong many times in the past…..haven’t we all. If you keep distrusting yourself however you will keep going around in ever decreasing circles.

To break this cycle, write down a list of 20 to 30 good decisions that you have made in the past based on your trust – your own judgement, your gut instinct. This will allow you to see that you can indeed trust your own decision-making.

4. Have a clear vision of what you want
It sounds obvious and that is because it is, but it is important to know exactly what type of person you want to be with and more importantly to note how you want them to make you feel. Write a list of how you wish them to make you feel. By doing this you will know when you have met them. No-one ever forgets how you make them feel, which is why this is a very powerful exercise.

5. Create vision of yourself.
Once you are clear on what you want from your soulmate, create a vision for yourself. It is said that your unconscious mind can only see pictures and whatever your unconscious sees, it believes! This is why sports men and women visualize themselves crossing the finish line in first place.
Inspiring yourself is essential to overcoming distrust. You new-found belief and vision will complement your ability to attract someone you can trust. The law of attraction, in this case to attract your soulmate, will only happen if your inner world changes and when you know exactly what you are looking for.

Do you have a vision of the Soulmate you would like to find?
Find out how Tillie ditched her misguided beliefs and whether or not she found her unconditional soulmate love …….you can read her story in the novel “Soulmate”, which is about love, lust and psychology!

“Soulmate” gets into the mind of Tillie as she details the highs and lows of life, when trying to find her “Soulmate” and all that this taught her. Lessons on false flattery, betrayal, injustice, deceit and the hardest lesson of all, the lesson of love;

Soulmate sand hearts
The power of soulmate love is awesome, physical and tangible. The power of genuine soulmate love is stronger than the ocean. A true soulmate will leave an indelible footprint on your heart…….

Different disguises
Soulmates come in all types of shapes, sizes and disguises; mother, sister, father, brother, work colleague, husband, wife, partner and of course lover. We tend not to take too much notice of their unique power over us, until that is we need them to stand by us and help to make us stronger.

There can be no doubt that such love surely has to be one of the most powerful forces in life; when it works well, when we are ‘in love’, life is truly wonderful. When it goes wrong however, life becomes wretched and we can suffer the most excruciating pain both physically and mentally.

Sub-conscious mind
All of us, without exception, consciously or sub-consciously, look for our soulmate in any given situation whether at home with the family, at work or within our social circle. Yes our soulmate, the one who we can truly relate to, who will support us and help make us stronger, who will, if you like, complete us, the one we will feel truly understood by and know that this person will always be with us in one capacity or another.

Sadly the reality of life tells us that relationships of any nature can be complicated and full of both highs and lows. Often we draw people towards us to help solve an immediate problem, or heal a deep seated wound or uncontrolled fear, sometimes these types of insecurities can stem back to our childhood, or from our past life or experiences.

Sometimes especially with family, friends and work colleagues we form an unspoken ‘spiritual contract’ by sub-consciously telling ourselves that we owe this soulmate for a previous kindness or favour; to be there for them as part of our contractual payback, they did something for us, so we are repaying our debt of gratitude.

Power of our ‘soul family’
Whether we are conscious of it or not, we all create our own ‘soul family’; the people we truly feel close to and connect with. It is said that we all have a soul group of nine and one of that soul group is meant to be our true soulmate or twin; the one and only one who truly we can become whole with when we are fused together.

Remember your soulmate comes in all types of shapes, sizes and disguises; mother, sister, father, brother, work colleague, husband, wife, partner or lover. Whoever they are they are the one that supports and understands you deeply.

Sometimes the ‘twin soulmate’ are meant to teach each other or evolve through each other and this can be both joyous and painful. Sadly for some soulmates it is not their destiny to be with each other, well not in this lifetime anyway…..

Have you experienced the power of Soulmate love?
Tillie has……you can read her story in “Soulmate”, which is a heartwarming tale of love, lust and psychology! “Soulmate” gets into the mind of Tillie as she details the highs and lows of life, when trying to find her “Soulmate” and all that this taught her. Lessons on false flattery, betrayal, injustice, deceit and the hardest lesson of all, the lesson of love; Was Pluto right do we only ever have one “Soulmate”?

Soulmate Encounter
Soulmate or guest?
For the vast majority of our life, we are surrounded by people. Some people that we like, some we don’t like or care about so much. Some of these people are family, some are friends, some are work colleagues and some are simply just passing acquaintances.

Have you ever stopped to think why it is that some of these people come into our lives and remain for there many years, some of these people may stay forever; whilst others stay for only a short period of time, and then leave without ever looking back.

Sometimes, dependant on the relationship we have with these ‘guests’, that come into our life leave the ability to be able to make us smile when we think about them. It can also be said that for some of our ‘guests’ the opposite is true, in that they make us feel very sad, hurt or even cry. Some ‘visitors’ are just like ships that past in the night and make no impression at all and are quickly gone and forgotten.

Our very existence, coupled with our individual and unique personality is defined by our interactions with all of these people who pass by us, whether they stay long term, short term or just simply pass in and out of our life fleetingly.

The in-betweens
Whoever they are, and most probably without even realising it, they shape our character, and can make a big difference on our life’s path. It is said that we should cherish every encounter and every person in your life that we meet: family, friends or foes, lovers and acquaintances as they are there for a reason….. To make us better and propel us forward. Everybody we meet in life we meet for a reason…….all you have to do is work out what that reason is.

So be loyal to the people you meet along life’s path, see each relationship through; those who are dear to your heart, your ‘soulmates’, who might need your hand or support, whether asking for it or not. Care about your family, friends and even those casual acquaintances and help your foes, and the winds will blow to your sails!

How do you know whether or not you have met your ‘Soulmate’? Well they are the people that walk across your heart and leave an indelible positive and happy footprint there….that never goes away.

And finally above all remember that we are sent our “Soulmates” in all manner of disguises….these are the people that love and respect you for who you are, and the way you are………

Have you had your ‘Soulmate’ encounter yet?
Tillie has……find out what happened to her; you can read her story in “Soulmate”, which is a novel about love, lust and psychology!

“Soulmate” gets into the mind of Tillie as she details the highs and lows of life, when trying to find her “Soulmate” and all that this taught her. Lessons on false flattery, betrayal, injustice, deceit and the hardest lesson of all, the lesson of love; Was Pluto right do we only ever have one “Soulmate”?